Seeing a summer movie is like going on a first date. Your expectations are usually pretty high or pretty low. You shell out your hard-earned summer cash for your ticket and your popcorn, just hoping to have a good time.

Sometimes you leave the theater laughing your ass off or raving about the special effects. Sometimes you part ways disappointed that the movie didn’t live up to the hype. So let’s take a look back at the summer films of 2003 and see which ones scored and which ones deserved to get dumped.

‘X2: X-Men United’

The first ‘X-Men’ opened in 2000 to a healthy $54 million in ticket sales, guaranteeing a follow-up. The movie jumps right into its engrossing plot – the heroic X-Men try to stop a bigoted military colonel from destroying the mutant population. Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) takes on soldiers who invade the mutant academy and fights razor-nailed villainess Lady Deathstrike (Kelly Hu). And then there’s Nightcrawler (Alan Cumming), whose exhilarating invasion of the White House made for one of my favorite scenes this summer. You can definitely count me in for the inevitable ‘X3.’

‘The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen’

Even if you’re not a comic book fan, you know characters like Batman, Spider-Man, and the Hulk. Few people realize, though, that ‘LXG’ is based on a cult graphic novel. Not that it really matters. Casting figures from books assigned in high school as superheroes is just ridiculous. The film chronicles adventurer Alan Quatermain’s (Sean Connery) recruitment of characters like Tom Sawyer (Shane West) and Captain Nemo (Naseeruddin Shah) to battle a shadow figure, ‘The Fantom.’ The laughable storyline and middling special effects left nothing extraordinary about this league of gentlemen.

‘2 Fast 2 Furious’

I was disappointed when I heard Vin Diesel wasn’t coming back for the sequel, and laughed out loud when I heard that Tyrese was replacing him. The cards were stacked against this film, but ‘2 Fast 2 Furious’ didn’t crash and burn. The plot was basic, but it was redeemed by the adrenaline-pumping street racing scenes – and the abundance of vehicular and female eye candy. ‘2 Fast 2 Furious’ wasn’t the greatest movie this summer had to offer, but the film exceeded my low expectations and made for an entertaining night out.

‘Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd’

Any student can recite at least six hysterical quotes from comedic classic ‘Dumb and Dumber,’ but the same can’t be said for ‘Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd.’ The prequel casts Eric Christen Olsen and Derek Richardson as high school-aged Harry and Lloyd. The two unwittingly foil the nefarious plans of their high school principal (Eugene Levy). Olsen and Richardson try to look and act the part, but they can’t match the genius of Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels. ‘Dumb and Dumberer’ deserved the failing grade it got from audiences.

’28 Days Later’

I hadn’t heard much about ’28 Days Later,’ but it turned out to be one of the biggest sleeper hits of the summer. This is not your average zombie movie. Cillian Murphy stars as Jim, a London bike messenger who awakens from a coma 28 days after England has been ravaged by a blood-borne virus that turns the infected into the undead. Some scares came from the zombies, but more chilling were the twisted motivations of the soldiers Jim and his companion Selena (Naomie Harris) turned to for help. The underlying social commentary, mixed with the gore we expect from summer movies, made ’28 Days Later’ work very well.

‘Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle’

What’s not to like about the first ‘Charlie’s Angels’ movie? It had Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Lucy Liu kicking ass and looking hot. ‘Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle’ was at the top of my to-see list, but I was let down. The plot was nearly identical to that of ‘Mission: Impossible.’ The special effects were terrible. They underused Demi Moore’s villainous former Angel. Sorry, Charlie, but this movie could have been a whole lot better.

Best movie of the summer: ‘Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl’

The best movie of the summer is based on an amusement park ride, and I can explain why it’s the best in two words: Johnny Depp. He gives the performance of his career as the charismatic Jack Sparrow. The wise-cracking Sparrow is a hoot as he rescues a damsel-in-distress from a band of skeleton pirates. The special effects are amazing. Sparrow and Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) duel in a cave, turning into skeletons every time they stumble into a ray of moonlight. Factor in a feisty performance from Keira Knightley and a couple clever nods to the ride, and it’s no wonder why ‘Pirates’ is the talk of Hollywood. The only question is, how long until the sequel?

Published on August 28, 2003 at 12:00 pm